You’re Not Broken. You’re Human.
If you’re feeling anxious right now, please take a deep breath and let it pass. There is nothing wrong with you.
Anxiety is not a personal failure or a flaw in your wiring. It is your survival brain trying to protect you. It may be doing so too aggressively, but it’s coming from a place of care.
Anxiety is something all healthy humans experience. We feel it because we care. About people. About outcomes. About not messing things up.
So, if you’re struggling, you’re not alone, and you’re not broken.
It is worth taking a moment to speak honestly about what anxiety is, where it comes from, how it shapes your experience, and most importantly, how you can begin to shift your relationship with it.
What is Anxiety?
Anxiety is the body’s way of saying, “Something might go wrong.” It’s a natural response built into your nervous system, designed to keep you safe. The problem is that this system can become oversensitive. It starts firing even when there’s no real danger.
You might feel a racing heart, a tight chest, looping thoughts, or a sense that something bad is about to happen. This isn’t your fault. It’s chemistry and conditioning.
But here’s the hopeful part. Just because anxiety shows up doesn’t mean it gets to take the lead. You can notice, acknowledge, and choose how you want to respond.
The Many Faces of Anxiety
Anxiety wears different masks. Maybe you relate to one of these:
- Situational Anxiety: Most of the time, you feel fine. Then, a situation like public speaking or a trip to the dentist brings on the fight-or-flight response.
- High Functioning Anxiety: You are outwardly successful but inwardly driven by a constant sense of pressure. You stay busy to avoid sitting in discomfort.
- Anxiety in Relationships: Maybe your partner feels anxious, or maybe you do. You walk on eggshells or overthink every message.
There are, of course, many other manifestations of anxiety, and each version is challenging in its own way.
Looking to the Past
Sometimes, the anxiety you feel in the present is not actually about the present. It is an echo from the past.
You might be responding to an old story.
“I’m not safe.”
“I always mess things up.”
“People will leave me.”
These beliefs often form early, when you do not feel seen or safe. Over time, they become invisible drivers of your reactions.
When challenging emotions arise, ask yourself:
What belief must I have to be feeling this way right now?
Is this belief really true, or is it just a story I’ve long been telling myself?
If so, where does this story originally come from?
Bringing these underlying limiting beliefs into the light is the first step to better understanding and navigating anxiety.
In the Now: Tools to Ground and Regain Calm
When anxiety shows up, you also need tools that work in real-time. I work with clients to create a game plan to keep on their phone or in their wallet, ready when needed.
Your Anxiety Gameplan Might Include:
A reminder: “This wave of anxiety will pass. It always does.”
A breathing exercise, like Square Breathing, to calm the nervous system.
Grounding yourself by pressing your feet into the floor and your back into a chair.
Visualize yourself as a mountain, steady and unmoved by the storm.
Mindfulness: “These thoughts are not me. They are objects of my awareness, which will pass like the clouds passing across the sky.”
Interrupting questions
“What’s really going on here?”
“Is my belief about this situation, the belief which causes the anxiety, really true?”
“What would be a more empowering belief about this situation?”
Gratitude check-in
Switch your focus to what is good in life:
“What am I proud of today?”
“What do I love?”
“Who loves me?”
Affirmations
“This too shall pass.”
“Everything I need is already within me.”
You are not powerless. Small constructive actions such as these, done with focus, can disrupt your habitual anxiety patterns and help you reassert control.
Taking Control of the Meaning
You can’t control situations, but you can control your response. Viktor Frankl famously encapsulated this: “Between stimulus and response, there is a space. In that space is our power to choose our response. In our response lies our growth and our freedom.”
When anxiety hits, you can focus on the negative like you usually do, or you can pause and ask:
What could this experience be teaching me?
What empowering meaning could I give to this moment?
Meaning changes everything. It turns struggle into growth.
Why Vision and Action Matter
One of the causes of anxiety is a lack of a compelling vision. If you don’t have something that excites you or pulls you forward, life can feel meaningless, and you can feel stuck.
Spend some time asking yourself:
What kind of future would light me up?
What would I love to build or become?
Once you have created that vision, even a small action toward it can give you momentum and a sense of empowerment.. More generally, action is arguably the best antidote to anxiety.
Remember progress, not perfection, is power..
Understanding Your Partner’s Anxiety
If someone you care about struggles with anxiety, your role is not to fix them. Your role is to sit beside them with compassion. Just listen. They may need you to offer your calm presence, not a list of quick solutions.
“I’m here. How can I support you right now?”
That moment of attunement can mean everything.
When It’s Time to Reach Out
There’s incredible strength in asking for help. If anxiety is interfering with your life, your relationships, or your sleep, it might be time to talk to someone.
Psychotherapy helps you understand your patterns and move forward from the past
Coaching helps you build the future you want to step into.
You can also blend both through an approach I call psy-coaching.
Whatever approach you choose, you do not have to walk this path alone.
Final Words: From Surviving to Thriving
You are not your anxiety.
You are not your past.
And you are not stuck.
There’s a path forward. It starts with awareness, is grounded in compassion, and is powered by action.
So, I leave you with this question:
What is one small, courageous step you could take today?
I would be honoured to walk that path with you.
I help people heal, grow, and create the life they deserve. Ready to begin? Book a Free No-obligation consultation now.
— O.S. Michael
